Maybe try not to take it so seriously - I know it can be difficult when you’ve invested a lot of time and effort into something, but at the end of the day it’s - literally - a game. Play who you want to play with, don’t play with who you don’t, and have fun. If it’s causing you stress or plays on your mind negatively, might be time to take a break.
Nothing bad intended by this post, hope you enjoy RDRO and other games with players you want to run with.