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Relationship question


ChrisCr0ss
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So my friend asked me today what to do in his position and I honestly didn't know what to say. Since he is a big time video gamer and basically like a lot of us here, I though I would as you all what you think he should do. 

So he and his girlfriend have been together 7 years. She lived with her friend and he lived at home with his parents still up until last year. He got a place and offered his girlfriend the option of moving in and she said no. Now this is something that seems odd to me. They have been together 6 years at the time and she turned him down for wanting to live together. He fluffed it off and went about his business. He invited my cousin (a mutual friend) to move in so he can cut the cost in rent. Well he has been there 3 weeks and she is begging him to let her move in now all of the sudden. This means he would have to ask my cousin, his friend to move out. 

Why out of no where is she so keen on moving in now that he is not alone? 

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On 5/21/2017 at 11:39 PM, Darko said:

Your friend should simply ask the girl what's up with her behavior?

This.

In my experience, it is likely down to her not liking the idea of other women being there. Like is the dude that moved in single? I can bet that is what it is!

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Ehh. This just sounds like a massive falling out waiting to happen. He will end up losing your cousin as a friend if he kicks him out or "chooses her" over him and she will likely end up breaking up with him or he will grow tired of her. I can't really say without knowing them personally but I think it is best to just say to her that he invited his friend and she had her chance. 

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On 5/21/2017 at 11:39 PM, Darko said:

Your friend should simply ask the girl what's up with her behavior?

He actually did and she laughed it off. Saying like "oh I just wasn't ready at the time, it was overwhelming." And "You didn't give me enough time to think it over".

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On 5/23/2017 at 5:03 PM, D3x said:

This.

In my experience, it is likely down to her not liking the idea of other women being there. Like is the dude that moved in single? I can bet that is what it is!

That is what I was thinking. Like what would change in the entire year he was living alone other than my cousin moving in and not being in a relationship? 

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On 5/25/2017 at 8:50 PM, ZLion said:

Ehh. This just sounds like a massive falling out waiting to happen. He will end up losing your cousin as a friend if he kicks him out or "chooses her" over him and she will likely end up breaking up with him or he will grow tired of her. I can't really say without knowing them personally but I think it is best to just say to her that he invited his friend and she had her chance. 

My cousin is a pretty chill dude and he would be mad at first but he would get over it cause it is a 7 year long relationship. Not like they only been together a few months or anything. And trust me, I agree completely. 

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Okay so here is the update. 

He spoke with her and as mentioned above, she blamed it on not having enough time to think it over. She had an ENTIRE YEAR! What bugs me is that he accepted that as an answer and he is likely going to allow her to move in once my cousin finds a new place. They have been together 7 years and nothing has progressed. That is what bothers me. She is not looking to settle down until she is ready even though he has asked her to marry him TWICE. 

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I will give you some insight from a female's perspective... 

She sounds like she wants him under her terms. Like she enjoys the security of having a "boyfriend" but she doesn't want to be THAT serious about it. She likely is a heavy flirt too. These kinds of women will strong along a man for YEARS because they are content with just having the title of being "girlfriend". He needs to sit down and ask her where she wants things to go. Clearly she is in no hurry and that isn't fair to him.

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